Not being able to trust the person you are in a relationship with is the fastest way to kill that relationship. Whether it’s a romantic, business or social relationship, trust matters a great deal. If you have trust issues, it’s important to learn fruitful ways to overcome them before the relationship is harmed.
Here are 7 tips that will help you:
- Consider what makes you fail to trust other people.
Trust is harder for some people than others, often due to past experiences, recent letdowns or maybe even the way you were raised as a child. Finding out the reason you don’t trust people will help you a lot.
- Think about what you expect from others
Also, knowing your expectation from others can help cut down trust issues. Perhaps you have very high expectations, maybe too high, and if such expectations are not met, you feel disappointed.
- Decide whether you’re prepared to trust or distrust life.
Think about the wider consequences of not trusting everyone throughout your life. It takes great effort, it alienates you and it leaves you constantly suspicious and disappointed. Is that an enjoyable way to live life?
- Give people their space.
Whether it’s for an intimate relationship or a business or social acquaintance, nobody likes to be smothered by someone who wants to know their every move. By backing off and letting people feel they have space around you, you create a space for honesty and greater sharing.
- Deal with past pain
Failed love, failed business deals, failed friendships… they all take their toll in the memory bank. But they are a part of your life, not all of it. Bad things do happen, yet how we react is what matters. Try to stop dwelling on what went wrong and start looking instead at what you learned from the experience.
- Make a decision to find more constructive ways to cope with breaches of trust
There is no guarantee in life that your trust won’t be broken. But you can make a decision to deal with such breaches in ways that don’t add to a negative view of life. For instance: Realise that some people are simply bad eggs. Not every person is though, so keep seeking the good. Take the lesson out of the situation you’ve gone through.
- Stop expecting others to know what you want
Unless you’re prepared to articulate your wants clearly, you cannot expect people to mind read. Learn to speak clearly, be assertive about your needs and stand up for what matters to you. It is unfair to blame others for letting you down if you’ve failed to make it clear in what ways you expected more from them.